Please just hear me out,
I don’t like burdening people with any of my problems but I am still going to try and see if anyone can hear me out. I’ve been living with my father in New York and the situation has been becoming very dangerous for my mental health. All of my life my father has chosen women over his own children I thought it would be different when I got older but it’s still the same. Still mentally abusive just because he knows that he’s the only person I truly fear due to being physically abused as a child. He still tells me I’ll be nothing and will amount to nothing even told me that no man will want me because I’m useless. I thought I could ignore but I can’t anymore. My mother passed away when I was a child so he’s my only parent. I’m ashamed wanting to end my life sometimes or self harming myself because the one parent who was supposed to take care of you, protect you, love you makes you hate yourself and want to die. I tried to be strong not let it get to me, but when you’re alone and have no one by your side to nurture you all you can do is think maybe he treats me like this because I am a burden to him…. The only time he ever wants to show any type of affection as a parent should is when he’s impressing a woman. He’s never helped me with anything besides keep a roof over my head. No I am not useless, I have a job, I paid all bills for my fair share of living there. All he had to do was pay rent. He works in two hospitals and rent is only 900$. His now 25 year old wife does not pay bills or rent but I didn’t expect anything less. I am about to get a new job soon that will pay more but I am also going to start school in the winter. I’m going to start living for me and not for him anymore…. not for anyone. What I am trying to say is that I want to move out…fast. I’m not expecting everyone to give me 5,000 just like that. Whatever anyone can help with it means the world to me. I will also be working and saving money as well. This is me asking for help to make the process go faster. So please if anyone can understand where I’m coming from and help me it will mean so much to me. Again I’m not expecting a lot, even a little will make such a big difference. Just knowing that I have other people by my side and that I’m not alone. Thank you for whoever is helping and hearing me out.
My paypal is : paypal.me/kayarielle
My youcaring is: https://www.youcaring.com/mikaylaoulai-913037
(via willow)